My story begins here ... June 28, 2009

My name is Nicolette, and I did not just wake up one day and decide that I was an addict. I was born an addict. Since a very young age, I portrayed the behaviors of an addict. I was always the little girl at the parties or family functions taking sips of everyone else's drinks. I drank to get drunk for the first time in fourth grade, but didn't make it a weekend thing until I was in sixth grade. I drank, but never smoked. A lot of my friends smoked weed but it just wasn't my thing, until I was too drunk at a party during February break in eighth grade and decided to try it. For the next two months, that is all I did, until marijuana just wasn't enough anymore. I began popping pills. By the time summer came, I was snorting cocaine.

A big part of my drug use came from not being able to deal with my emotions and feelings. I was never comfortable with myself and in seventh grade, I began seeking attention from males for validation. I thought it was what I wanted, but got so deep into it, that I no longer knew how to say "no." During spring break, I was raped. I didn't understand what was wrong with me. Why me? What did I do to deserve this? From that point on, I got "out of myself" any chance I could. I was going from relationship to relationship trying to convince myself that I was worth something to other people. My last relationship, at age 14, was poison. He was 17 and we met because of drugs. I became extremely co-dependent on him and allowed him to control me. I started my freshman year on a Xanax binge, and by the third week of school, I overdosed in the locker room before cheer practice. I got kicked off the team for the second year in a row and thought it was funny. I continued doing drugs and wound up waking up in the hospital after getting my stomach pumped, with 13 stitches in my face from mixing alcohol with God knows what kind of pills. This still didn't stop me. I went on a five-month OxyContin and cocaine binge and lost 30 pounds in three weeks ... still it wasn't enough for me. I progressed to heroin. Two weeks into snorting it, I began shooting up and overdosed again for the third time, at age 14. After five days in the hospital, I went to Outreach House II in Long Island, an inpatient adolescent therapeutic community (TC) and, finally, got it together. At first I was reluctant, but eventually accepted the process. It took me 13 months to complete treatment, but it ultimately saved my life.

I just made honor roll for all four quarters — amazing since I never went to school during my addiction. I got accepted into the dance program at a prestigious high school for the arts, and I now have a job. If I can do it, then anyone can. I have never been happier in my whole life. I am recovery!

My name is Nicolette. This is my story. What's Your Story?

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